Do you have a question about relationships and flirting?

You can email me about any of your relationship and flirtation questions, and I'll be happy to address them in my blog. Won't that be fun! Its very Dear Abby, but hey...I'm just as good as she is! Just put "Dear Ottis" in the subject. Make sure your letters are annoymous though, to protect you and me. Send all questions to

Monday, May 19, 2014

Are You a Coward?

The world has changed. It is definitely not the same place it was when I was young. And that's nothing compared to the changes that have happened since my parents were kids. Can you imagine how much it has changed since when our grandparents were kids? Good gracious! There are both positive and negative changes: the civil rights movement, the abortion movement, the internet, smart phones, Facebook, Facetime, Skype, cell phones, computers, game systems, gay marriage equality movement, etc etc etc. The world has become so much smaller in so many ways, and yet in other ways it is more distant than ever. Despite having more ways than ever to connect to people, we have become more and more disconnected from each other. One of the side effects of this disconnection is a flare in cowardice. Allow me to explain.

Wednesday, April 30, 2014

The Final Good-bye

Having a relationship end between two people is such a fascinating roller coaster of emotions. The thoughts and feelings that go through a person's head and heart are complex, confusing, bewildering, heart wrenching, dramatic, traumatic, fierce, numbing, and extremely powerful. This past year, as I have discussed the breakups of several of my close friends--as I have counseled and cried with them--I have found a common thread: how could I ever do better? How could I possibly find someone who loved me as much? The question eats at the core of a person. It causes such pain for weeks and months after the relationship ends. So, I thought I'd share some of my thoughts and insights.

Tuesday, April 22, 2014

The Hunger Games Easter Egg Hunt

This year in lieu of seeing my family and doing the normal holiday traditions, I had a different journey. It was exciting in its own ways, but that's neither here nor there. One of the most fun things we did this Easter was the first annual Hunger Games Easter Egg Hunt. Let me explain the rules, oh and may the odds be ever in your favor.

Wednesday, April 16, 2014

One Year and Counting

One year ago this week I got my life back. It wasn't an easy task—but I have my life back. So here I am to tell some of my story: I am an "abuse" survivor. You know when people say "abuse," it always makes me think of some terribly sappy Lifetime movie. There is always some kind of context, script, some kind of happy take-home message, and a purpose. That's not my experience; that's not my life.

Saturday, March 29, 2014

A Letter from a Student

This week after one of our rehearsals, during the flurry of people exiting and entering the room, I found a letter on the piano that had been left by one of my students upon exiting. At first my heart dropped when I saw it. Had I offended someone, and now was about to learn what I had done? Was I about to receive a chastisement? I don't know why I always jump to those conclusions...haha. Anyway, I decided to share the letter here. Read away :)